In the past, the bride’s mother has taken on most of the prewedding responsibilities, while the groom’s family assumed more of a backseat. These days, both moms take on significant roles in the planning process, especially if the two families are splitting wedding finances. No matter the case, here’s what’s typically expected of the mother of the groom.
Host a dinner.
After calling your parents to congratulate them and express her happiness, she can offer to host a dinner to introduce you and your family to anyone on your fiancé’s side of the family you may not have met. Even if it’s just an invite for cocktails or a dinner out on the town, any sort of meet-and-greet will surely be appreciated by all parties.
Help with your vendor search.
She can get involved by helping scout out ceremony and wedding reception venues and ask friends for recommendations for caterers, florists and other vendors. She can also serve as a contact for the pros—especially if the wedding is taking place where she lives. It’s nice to offer to take some of the planning burden off your shoulders.
Manage the groom’s side of the family.
After asking how many guests she’s able to invite, she can draw up the guest list (and keep track of her RSVPs) for her side of the family and, if appropriate, offer financial assistance if it makes sense (she should also be aware of expenses typically covered by the groom’s family). Additionally, if there are any family or ethnic traditions that should be incorporated into the ceremony or reception, she should help the groom choose those too. Lastly, she should obtain information on where you’re registered and help spread the word to her side.
Attend the bridal shower.
If possible, the groom’s mother should attend the bridal shower and buy a gift.
Figure out day-of fashion with the mother of the bride.
She should consult your mom on her wedding day outfit to make sure there’s no clashing. She should start shopping for her own outfit about four to six months before the wedding.
Plan and host the rehearsal dinner.
Traditionally speaking, the mother of the groom is responsible for planning and hosting the rehearsal dinner with the grooms’ father (typically) the night before the wedding. She should start planning it out around six months in advance.
Be on deck during the wedding.
If you’re planning on having a receiving line, the mother of the groom (along with the father of the groom) should stand in it after the couple. If there’s a parents’ table, they should be seated there too. Lastly—and this one probably goes without saying—she should be there to dance with her son during the mother-son dance.
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Source: The Knot